How to Turn the Temperature Down
When the weather heats up, it’s not just our homes that can feel stifling – our emotions can too. Sleepless nights, sticky days and a general sense of discomfort can leave everyone feeling on edge. Tempers can fray more quickly, patience can wear thin and small changes can suddenly feel overwhelming.
And it’s important to say: this isn’t just something children experience. Adults feel it just as much. In fact, when we are tired, hot and overwhelmed, we’re often more prone to reacting quickly rather than responding calmly.
The simple, practical tools learnt as part of Functional Family Therapy (FFT) can help the whole family to manage these moments and “turn the temperature down”, both physically and emotionally.
Why heat affects how we feel
Hot weather can disrupt sleep, increase dehydration, and make everyday tasks feel harder. When our basic needs aren’t met, our emotional regulation becomes more difficult.
You might notice:
Irritability or frustration building more quickly
Shorter attention spans (for both adults and children)
More frequent arguments or misunderstandings
Feeling overwhelmed by minor issues
Recognising this is the first step. It helps us move from “Why are they behaving like this?” to “Everyone is struggling a bit right now.”
Window of Tolerance
Recognising that when our window narrows, our tolerances are reduced, having us react in bigger ways than we might normally.
S.T.O.P.
Stop - Take a brief pause
Take a Breath
Observe (acknowledging thoughts, feelings and the environment)
Proceed Mindfully - Make a choice about what to do next
Mantras
Mantras or helpful messages you say to yourself can help to remind you that you’ll get through these difficult moments and this heat will pass!
TIPP
Using TIPP (Temp, Intense exercise, Paced-breathing, Progressive muscle relaxation)
Temperature (cold): Slows heart rate and distracts from intrusive thoughts and intense emotions. Take a cold shower, use a wet cloth to face or neck, place feet in a bucket of cold water.
Intense exercise: Lowers stress hormones and increases feel-good neurotransmitters. Go swimming, cycling, do some boxing routines, skipping, brisk walk.
Paced breathing: Increases oxygen intake and lowers heart rate and blood pressure. Take 5 long, deep breaths through your nose, and exhale through puckered lips.
Progressive muscle relaxation: Helps the body let go of stress and triggers the relaxation response. Place both feet flat on the floor. Wiggle your toes. Curl and uncurl your toes several times. Spend a moment noticing the sensations in your feet. Clench your hands into fists, then release the tension. Repeat this 10 times.
Turning the temperature down together
Hot weather can challenge the whole family—but it also offers an opportunity to practise slowing down, showing understanding, and working together.
Using these simple FFT-inspired tools you can help create a calmer, more connected environment, even on the hottest days.
Connect with others in tolerable ways: for some, it can feel too much to spend time together, especially if it increases the heat! Stay connected by sending a text, sharing a joke, doing something thoughtful for others.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be patient and gentle with yourself. Resist the urge to be critical of yourself if you’re finding this time hard.
Distraction: If you focus your attention elsewhere, you’ll notice the discomfort less. Do something creative, watch funny videos, or play a game.
Because sometimes, turning the temperature down isn’t about the weather at all, it’s about how we respond to each other.